Sticks and Stones Break My Bones, But Words Can Also Hurt Me?

Please excuse my jumbled thoughts, Perhaps I may get my message across.


Something has been in the back of my mind for a few weeks.

Throughout my TTC journey, I have heard many women say "speak no negativity over my body" or something of the sort.

Even though I had heard this before many times, I never put it into practice myself.

I am so guilty of beating the crap out of myself during my attempts and failures while trying to conceive and carry our first child.

I will probably be guilty of this during this cycle also.

At my former fertility specialist's office, I rarely got positive feedback.
In fact, Dr. Negative seemed reluctant to give credit when credit was due.

It was always, "you've had this many eggs retrieved but..., we transferred these eggs, but..., your beta is positive, but.., your age is a huge factor!", etc, etc, ETC!!

Felt like the guy never had anything nice to say!

Fast forward to my new specialist

Now regardless of the outcome of the cycle, I can say that I have been treated in such a positive manner!

The nurses where aware of my past IVF cycles and were nothing but positive in my treatment.

The doctor that performed my egg retrieval came to talk to me before the procedure.
He said, "Let's agree that this is the last time you have to do this. Let's shake on it."

Whew ,I'm not used to me treated like this! Is someone coming through that little side door to beat me over the head?

After my retrieval, while in my post anesthesia fog, a nurse patted my shoulder and said, "you did a good job sweetie"

Who the heck is she talking to? Oh she's talking to me! It's because I paid cash isn't it?

I had grown too accustomed to negativity.

I brace for impact anytime a medical professional nears.


Then, last week, I read my dear buddy Kim's blog.

My heart lurched when I read that her doctor called her an "anomaly", crushing her spirits and causing her to feel so badly about herself.

Made me mad! I wanted to choke her "Dr. Wacko"
Like a child, I wanted to yell "Dr. Wacko, you hurt my friend. You're a bad bad man!"

She is doing so much to make and keep herself healthy. I think she does more than that Dr. does for himself. 

Kim,don't let his negative words touch you again!

I've got your back sister!

Then I thought about a scene in a really cool movie I once owned.

Someone has my copy and I want it back!

It was Called "What the bleep Do We Know?"

There are many messages contained withing the movie, but one comes to mind when dealing with all this.

It was about the power of words and thoughts. It referred to an experiment that Dr. Emoto conducted on water.

Water crystals displayed different properties based on the words or emotions directed towards them.

My favorite line from the scene is "If thoughts can do that to water, imagine what our thoughts can do to us"

Now, can't say that I have mastered this, but you and I must remember to not be so hard on ourselves in this struggle.

No matter the outcome.
We need to not think or say these negative things about ourselves.
We need to remember to love ourselves, despite how angry we might want to feel towards our bodies.

Easier said than done, right?

There will be times that I may need you to remind me of this.

Let's try to be good to ourselves today, Despite what is happening.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMfCvdyaNGQ