My Little Sanctuary

I awaken in my sanctuary or in other words, my bed.

Took a few moments this morning thinking of how my bed has become my safe haven, my sanctuary, my refuge.
Those first few moments upon wakening contain so much bliss.
I almost dread placing my first foot on the floor. That's moment when the reality of real life sets in.

In my bed, my sanctuary, anything is possible.
In my sanctuary I'm not infertile.
In my sanctuary I never miscarried.
In my sanctuary the biological clock never ticks.
In my sanctuary everyone is well and my mom is healthy.

I place that first foot on the floor and reality comes rushing back.

We rushed my mother back to the ER around 1:00 am Friday morning.
She had a high fever and could not walk.
It turns out that the infection plaguing her liver had come back with a vengeance.
During this episode we discovered the cause of the infection.
It was the procedure done a few months ago. The stint in her bile duct had caused the infection.
She doing much better today but won't be home for Easter.

Trying desperately to remain calm.

Today marks day 10 of stims for me and my latest IVF cycle.
Was supposed to trigger tonight but my fancy new doctor is pushing me one more day.
This new protocol is so different but maybe different may be better in this case.

Yesterday, My dear husband froze me a nice new batch of swimmers for this cycle.
Unfortunately he won't be in town for my retrieval.
Kinda funny, conceiving babies with my husband hundreds of miles away!

Tomorrow is another full day.
Bloodwork and ultrasound at the crack of dawn
Traditional breakfast at my mother in law's
Head to my parent's house to help my sister cook Easter dinner and head to the hospital with a goody bag for Mom.


Oh and possible trigger for my egg retrieval on Tuesday.

Looking forward to visiting my sanctuary tonight!